#shitmywifesays
Live, measured metrics for the hashtag #shitmywifesays from the open social web. Every number carries a named source and the time it was fetched. Nothing is estimated.
Own #shitmywifesays
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Day-by-day usage
measured · fosstodon.org (Mastodon public tags API) · fetched 2026-08-04 14:49 UTC0 uses by 0 unique accounts across the window. Real per-day counts, not estimates. Newest bar is today so far.
Related hashtags
measured · fosstodon.org (Mastodon public search API) · fetched 2026-08-04 14:49 UTCNo related tags with measured usage found for #shitmywifesays.
Live pulse
measured · fosstodon.org (Mastodon tag timeline) · fetched 2026-08-04 14:49 UTCEverything below is measured over the latest 10 public posts (spanning ~61354 hours).
Posting hours (UTC)
Languages: English (8) · German (2)
Avg boosts / post: 0.2
Top of the latest posts
"I need you to go away, and send me a husband exactly like you, but without the snoring." #ShitMyWifeSays
We were having an interesting and highly-neurospicy conversation with lovely wife. She used the word burgeoning in passing, to which we advised we can't unassociate that word from icky transphobe Germaine Greer. Wife then described her as a
SleepyCatten (Metastable, Skill Regression Arc)@[email protected]♥ 0↻ 02025-07-09 23:26 UTCView post →I go in the kitchen to make a coffee and notice the oatmeal cream cookies my wife made a couple days ago are all gone. So I lay it on super thick, "who the FUCK ate the last oatmeal cookie". "I did!" she says. "Now what am I gonna do for an
#shitmywifesays across platforms
every network with a public tag surfaceFollow #shitmywifesays straight to each platform’s own tag page. Where a platform publishes open data we measure it above; the rest lock their numbers behind paid APIs, so we link rather than guess.
Every number above is measured from a named public API at the shown fetch time. Nothing is estimated or extrapolated. Platforms that lock their data behind paid APIs are not shown. Agents: the same numbers, as JSON, at /api/hashtags/shitmywifesays